arise: (mass effect ♥ integrity)
We set up the cot today, now that everyone is over the great Gastro Plague of '12. Pregnancy has basically been a series of "wow, this is real" waves, and having a fully functioning cot sitting in the bedroom just waiting for a baby is another one. My mother also delightedly informed me that 36 weeks was when she went into labour with me, so there's that to consider. Being pregnant has also gotten to a fever pitch of being incredibly fucking uncomfortable, so there's that. I barely have the energy to do anything, and moving too fast/in the wrong way/in a way that displeases some capricious god causes pain in my poor over-extended stomach muscles. A lot of this is probably being exacerbated by the fibro, but it's also just pregnancy classic.

idk, part of me feels like I must be really unprepared, though. I've been reading pregnancy books and trying to take them seriously, but so much of it feels so... pointless. Like birth plans. I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with wanting to have twenty scented candles lit and Enya playing and all that, but it's hard to get that worked up about it. Maybe I just have a more resigned attitude when it comes to medical professionals. All I really care about is them doing their jobs as quickly and efficiently as possible so we can all get out of there in one piece. The only thing I feel even remotely strongly about is not wanting a c-section, and that's just because I don't want to be stuck in hospital any longer than I have to be.

Ah well. I'm just going to try and enjoy the time I've got left before things change forever etc. etc.. It's a strange feeling now, because I am just waiting, and I'm both excited and apprehensive at the same time. I want it to happen quickly, but I also want the last few days or weeks to last as long as they can. The only thing I can even slightly compare with is waiting for school or uni to start again in the last few days of break, but... obviously it's a lot longer than just a semester.
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